I Am So Mad At This Chair

Look at this thing. I get mad every time I see it. In fact, I’m mad right now.

practically perfect except for one thing

I’m still on my quest for British Colonial ish decor. To me, that means elements of BC style but livable and attractive in the contemporary world. I’m not looking to recreate the Bombay Officers Club right down to the last authentic detail but I want to include the elements that make a style BC – light colors, traditional British furniture done in tropical materials, sheer curtains, natural fiber rugs, indoor palm trees, and locally inspired accessories. Basically, the British transported their furnishings and appurtenances and then adapted to the heat and the availability of local material supply.

So in the family room, I do have a thing the BCs never even dreamed about – a  cushy sectional sofa. Because I’m not entirely stupid and I want to be comfortable. But I wanted to add a rattan chair to the seating area to lighten things up and bring back the BC. This chair hits all the marks: it’s rattan, has caning, is the right neutral color,  is a minimalist modern interpretation of a traditional British wing-backed arm chair. And it’s very reasonably priced, as these things go , with free shipping from an on-line merchant. It’s practically perfect except for one thing: the seat is only 16″ high. Doesn’t that make you mad?

I could never sit in it myself because I’d need two strong men plus a crane to get me out of it. I could live with that because I only want to gaze upon it anyway and you can’t enjoy the view if you’re the one sitting in it. But I’m not so cruel as to make my guests even the ones with good knees struggle to get out of it. That would bring down any kind of pleasant evening and might possibly be the only thing they’d remember when the visit was over. So, I had to let it go. I got a very nice rattan arm chair from Pier One and it serves my purposes very well. But, still every time I look at this picture, I get mad all over again that some design dope somewhere out there couldn’t make those legs 2″ taller.

I’m also mad at a table. Although, truthfully in this case I’m mad at myself for buying the wrong thing. I wanted a small round table to put in a corner so we can play cards of just sit and have a cup of coffee together in the evening, (Reality intrudes: it’s very unlikely that we will ever be playing cards there and any evening coffee is going to consumed by Sami alone and it will be the McDonald’s senior citizen special for 38¢) so found a round pedestal table made of solid wood and stained the right shade of dark brown. I dithered for a while trying to decide on the 30″ version or the 36″ version. i finally pulled the trigger on the 36″ and it turned out to be just a tiny bit too big for the space. [Note to self: stick with your original plans.]

le sigh
le sigh

I did not look forward to any husbands around here backing those chairs into the buffet or scraping them against the walls while trying to squeeze into a seat. So after trying to live with my mistake for 2 full days, I knew I had to make a change. Disassembling it, repacking it and paying for insured return shipping and a restocking fee was not practical so I sold it. The ad was online for about 36 hours before someone offered me my full asking price and then took it away within another 30 minutes. My asking prices was what I paid minus what it would have cost me to return the item, so it was a bargain for them and a relief for me. I ordered the same table in the 30″ version and it arrives here tomorrow.

This is what has been keeping me busy.

4 thoughts on “I Am So Mad At This Chair”

  1. I love the little table. Well, the one that will show up soon. 😉 First thing I thought about the chair: “It’s either huge or the seat is very close to the ground. Look at those ickle bickle legs!” Pretty, though.

  2. I tried to guess what it was that made you mad about such a nice looking chair before reading why.
    I got it right.

    Why would anyone want a chair with such short legs? Are there corgi people out there somewhere who fit comfortably on a low chair? Maybe it’s built for people with short dogs who won’t stay off of the furniture. Maybe it’s built for the dogs on purpose. Maybe it was designed by the same people who burn cars as a form of protest. Maybe the designer hates white people of privilege. (Have “studies” majors spilled over into design courses?)

    My grandmother had a short chair in her bedroom that she threw her clothes over instead of a hamper. (I come from a long line of women with design aspirations and cluttered bedrooms.) I’d probably buy it and use it that way. It’s hard to overcome generations of poor decision making.

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