2/8/15 The next time I go to Denver for a week, I’m taking a purse full of saline nasal spray with me. I’m starting to think that the beautiful puffy hairdos that result from the dry climate cannot counterbalance the dry skin, the cracked fingertips or the dried blood chunks in your nose.
10/21/14 I read on the online somewhere that there are 11 Fridays left until Christmas and that kind of thing annoys me greatly because it represents what I hate about the internet but it did make me feel like I had to start shopping [that’s a joke I never stop shopping] and so I was ready to pay full price for a luxury designer item and then I found an online promo code which saved me $50 so now everything is all right.
10-14-14 I didn’t sleep much last night. I don’t usually sleep much but today I feel it. Not only do I not sleep much in terms of total time but, I also don’t sleep for a continuous period. The only time that happens is if I’m in a hotel with a roommate who is one of those weirdos that prefers darkness and silence all night long. Did you know that Craig Ferguson is leaving The Late Late Show in December? Why would I sleep through the broadcasts that are left?
10-11-14 I made White Bean Chicken Chili yesterday and it was so delicious that I’ve eaten it for every meal since. [note to self: give it a rest.] I got the recipe from a former business acquaintance who was inspired by the soup at Ruby Tuesday’s but then she threw in whatever she felt like and made it up as she went along. So OF COURSE it’s delicious.
8/21/11 I used to insist that my meals be piping hot. Now I don’t really care as long as it’s all one temperature – all hot, all cold or all room temp. Exception: coffee. I still insist that my coffee starts out at 211°. Hello, McDonalds!
8-20-11 For the most part, I am full of baloney.
8-2-11 Let me tell you something about me and my fambly – we’re thick as thieves. Well, not my fambly – my marinades. Sorry! I’m still under the spell of RHoNJ. I got the idea that I should pull out the old George Foreman and grill up some boneless chicken breasts. Of course, the old GF can only do so much on its own so I took 5 boneless breasts, sliced them into thin horizontal halves and then made 2 marinades so they would have some kind of flavor and character after they were GF’d. The first one is A1 Sauce, Worcestershire sauce, hot sauce and scallions. I call it a jerk marinade but the only reason I say that is because I once got a recipe from a genuine Jamaican that involved chicken and A1 Steak Sauce. The other one is no-frills bottled Italian dressing mixed with soy sauce, garlic and copious amounts of chopped rosemary and thyme from my herb pots. They are thick as thieves! The first is thick owing to its steak sauce base and the second is thick due to the chopped, pulverized and macerated herbs in great volume. I am quite sure that my fambly will be be astonished.
7-22-11 Yeah – you know what I miss? I miss my scissory little egg topper. I wonder where that thing got to? I used to think it fell down behind a kitchen drawer but we took everything apart last year when we painted the cabinets and it never surfaced. Gawd, hot soft boiled eggs with the topmost section of the peak cleanly removed, the perfect teaspoon-sized opening, salt. Gawd. OMG – look at this thing – an egg cup with it’s own spoon and individual salt shaker. Gawd.
6-30-11 One of our summer pleasures is iced mint tea brewed with dried mint. Ever since the dog gave up bashing through my flowerbeds, the mint sprig I planted has positively thrived and taken over so I thought I’d brew some fresh mint into the latest batch. The Hub took me aside to counsel me on that, as if he was going to help me out in some social situation by alerting me to bad breath or a runner in my stocking*. He told me the flavor it was “too wild”. I may have overdone it by ripping out an entire plant to brew. I’ll just use less next time. He won’t even know. That is the secret to a happy marriage – keeping it wild, but not so wild that your spouse can’t handle it.
*I threw in that bit of extinct quaintness because I like to be the voice of history whenever I can.
6-16-11 It suddenly occurs to me that I’d better start shopping for new underwear. I’ve recently been on the receiving end of some extremely positive attention in my career and I feel undeserving. Kind of like a high-school nerd who couldn’t get a girl to look at him but now is in a position of power and can’t believe that he’s getting attention from hot girls. If I suddenly take to Tweeting panty pics, I want to be ready.
6-15-1 When I was in nursing school, I lived in a dormitory and ate my meals almost exclusively from the hospital cafeteria. My sister nursing students enlightened me about this breakfast sandwich: a toasted and buttered English muffin, 2 pork sausage links split lengthwise and laid on the muffin bottom, grape jelly spread on the inside of the muffin lid. It was the standard breakfast of us all for three years. I haven’t had it since but I think about it a lot.
6-12-11 I broke the 100 Mile Rule last week. I was tired and hungry when I finally got to my hotel and was disappointed to find out there was no in-house restaurant. So I ordered a pizza delivery from a famous franchise. I forgot that I promised myself never to attempt pizza or bagels if I’m farther than 100 miles from NYC. It looked like a pizza but tasted like ketchup on a cracker. The South! Banana pudding yes; pizza no.
6-10-11 Last night’s delayed and highly irritating flight home from Nashville was 50% business travelers, 49% supercool but non-famous musicians and 1% gimps. Gimps rule. The plane was out of booze and water. So that’s how it’s gonna be, eh United? When we were purely Continental, we always had booze.
5-24-11 I just had an orange that was so juicy that I had to get partially undressed to eat it. Hey! That would have been a good tweet.
5-15-11 Hard to believe but The Hub made a point of walking over to where I was sitting three times tonight to let me know what I did wrong today*. The last time he came over, I handed him a pad and pencil and told him to write it all down so he only has to walk over once. I AM SO FUNNY.
* 1. put the dishes in the drainer facing the wrong direction 2. threw the plastic containers into the cupboard so that they fall out when you open the cabinet door 3. failed to line the baking pan with foil when I roasted the broccoli.
5-14-11 Here I am sitting in front of the computer goofing off while everyone else is out in the noonday sun toiling in the yard. That is entirely their fault. I get up early and get my outdoor stuff done before the sun has a chance to shine on me. I hope their exaggerated grunting doesn’t interfere with my siesta.
4-23-11 I’m tired. This last business trip really wore me out. I overreacted to everything, I imprudently responded to hot emails as soon as I read them instead of waiting to cool off and once I had to leave the room so I wouldn’t cry. Maybe I’m not tired so much as worn out.
4-22-11 This is what’s wrong with the internet: just because you like bacon doesn’t mean you would like a bacon lollipop
4-1-11 Your shoe is untied.
3-30-11 I should probably update this since the link is now so prominently displayed on the front page. Current information: I’m wearing stretched out underpants. I fell down yesterday and jammed my wrist. I haven’t had much luck lately cooking meat. There – now we’re up to speed.
7-4-09 Here’s the sitch:
* back of the neck – 4 day old burn from a curling iron
* left wrist – infected spider bite
* left forefinger – needle-like thorn embedded
* ankles – multiple mosquito bites.
6-24-09 Whatever happened to the blogging COMMUNITY? You know … the people who used to manage a civil give-and-take in the comments. Are you all over on Facebook? That’s for people without blogs. Get back here.
6-4-09 – I’m starting to lose my enthusiasm for air travel.
5-12-09 – If only weeding a garden didn’t involve so much bending over, I think I might be better at it. As it stands now, all I have to commend me is a strong sense of color and a willingness to stick my bare hands into the dirt.
3-20-09 – I am suddenly overcome with a craving for toast and fried eggs.
3-3-09 – I have never pooped in an airplane rest room and I never will. Why do people do that? Is it not something that everyone can control? Furthermore, I rarely pee in an airplane rest room – maybe once every two years.
2-23-08 – Color me disappointed. Do you not see that I change the tag line beneath the Cripes, Suzette! banner at least three times a week? Sometimes it reflects a recent post; other times it’s just a phrase that captures my fancy. In all the time that I’ve been doing this, no one have ever commented about it. I expected more.
2-2-08 – This isn’t pretty: My most outstanding characteristic is that I am a procrastinator. Once you get that, then you can move on to recognizing that I have a lot of good ideas that I start and then drop unfinished. That’s how it is.
1-21-08 – I am the sort of person who is always hot. It’s cold now at the Jersey shore – the real kind of cold, for the first time in a long time so I wore a coat today. But I wore it not because I tought I needed it – who needs a coat to run from the house to the car and from the car to the office? It’s not like I’m out on a hike. I wore it for social approval. I am nothing if not prudently, however, so I make sure that I have a coat in my car in case I ever get stranded due to a breakdown and I have to walk on the shoulder of the Garden State Parkway for aid. Or I guess I could wear it while I call AAA on my cellphone.
10/24/07 – I have enough purses. I need more purses. I ran out of room to store all of my purses. I don’t like any of my purses, so I suspect that a new purse is in my immediate future. That is all true, and yet I care not for shoe fashion.
7/28/07 – My knee hurts.
5/28/07 – I do a fair amount of small animal extermination but I don’t get any pleasure out of it. Blame them, not me. Small animals interfere with my plans and then I HAVE to kill them. See?
5/14/07 – NOTICE: I’ve given up use of pseudonyms, initials or cute names for the real people in my posts. It ties in with the tagline of the current blog incarnation: “This time, it’s personal …” meaning I am endeavoring to be more open and less edited about what I write here. But, why did I ever do that in the first place? I find it extremely annoying. My rejection of meme participation remains unchanged. Meme-free since 2001! Huzzah!
5/5/07 – I’ve had very few good ideas in my lifetime. Among those are the three blogs that contain me: Bob the Corgi, The Joy of Soup and Cripes, Suzette! I’ve authored more than three blogs – I’d say the total was about 9, but these are the three that stick. In order, I blogged at:
Bob the Corgi (Blog*Spot)
The Joy of Soup
Bob the Corgi (Greymatter)
Under The Same Moon
Buzz Says the Bee
Big American Blonde
Bob the Corgi (Typepad)
The Garden State
Traveling In Style
Bob the Corgi redux
Cripes, Suzette ! II
The Garden State was a good idea, but I lacked the energy to both garden and blog about it. It was either/or so I chose to actually do it. I regret that I didn’t save the files, though.
8/17/05 – THE DAILY ZEN. I read a long and beautiful passage about spirit and vitality. It was very impressive and I was surprised at the feeling of tranquility that came over me as I thought about the words. Especially surprising to me was the fact that such wisdom was written by The Monkees. Oh, Monkess. I guess I’m not ready yet. Also, what if your daily meditation takes place in front of an old Benihana mug shaped like the buddha? Does it still count?
8/3/05 – FGAs. (Frequently Given Answers, as opposed to Frequently Asked Questions.)
I’m liking the minimalism of my latest page design. I realize that some functionality is lost by not including things like “recent posts” and “archives” but I want the day’s entry to be the focus. I like the idea that there is no history with which to compare the content and format of the current offering.
3/30/05 – RINGS AND THINGS. I have a thing against drinking hot beverages from a dark cup. I prefer a white cup because how else can you tell if the cup was clean before your coffee was poured into it? Dimly lit restaurant + dark brown pedestal mug = asking for trouble. You know I’m right about this.
2/14/05 – NO JOY FOR YOU. I am also the author of a little website known as the J*y of S*up. Recently, I recieved a cease and desist notice from lawyers connected with the J*y of C**king books who want me to stop using the phrase “j*y of”, the lowercase font and the color red because the public might confuse my hobbyist website with their megalopublishing empire. After thoughtful consideration, I decided this was total bullshit and that the thing to do was to spit into their eye and tell them that I had no intention of changing. So I did. Now I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.
1/16/05 – MANIFESTO. If the newly remodeled SuperShopRite had a wooden door, I’d nail this list to it. But since it’s got that awful revolving door that is the only legitmate way in or out of the place, I’ll have to post this here. Reasons Why I Won’t Be Going Back to Shoprite:
1. That awful revolving door that is the only legitmate way in or out of the place. I resent being directed through the plant, jewelry and t-shirt department. As if the mere act of walking through is going to make me cave in a buy a red plush moneky holding a lacy heart.
2. The bread department is nothing to write home about. There’s nothing special there and I am certainly not going to pay $3.99 for a loaf of rye bread that is not even baked on the premesis.
3. In the dairy case, the individual containers of flavored yogurt are placed at eye level and the big containers of plain yougurt are on the topmost shelf, increasing the chances that (a) you will not be able to reach them if the first row is already gone and (B) if you try, you might end up dropping it.
4. Some piker brand of refrigerated pickles has replaced the superior BaTempte selection and whatever brand it is doesn’t offer New Kraut.
1/5/05 – NIGHT OF THE GARDEN CATALOG. Forget springtime – this is the time of year that I find to be the most hope-filled. The ground is unworkable, the temperature is still on the way down, daylight is at its shortest and I am ordering hardcopies of gardening catalogs from the internet. Is there anything more optimistic than a gardener in winter? Can there be more peace found anywhere than late evening in front of the fireplace, thumbing through White Flower Farms and admiring the pink glow that bounces off the falling snow?
12/27/04 – DOWNSIZED. I have recently made a promise to myself to give up oversized purses and to carry a small handbag that can only accomodate the bare essentials: carkeys, celphone and wallet. It’s a tough adjustment. I often find myself dragging a cloth tote bag, paper gift bag or plastic supermarket bag along with me to handle the overflow. But I am determined to make this switch. Everyday I am getting more comfortable about living without all my gear right in my hand. I keep it nearby, though, because you never know when you will have an urgent need for some of this stuff.