Two Years Ago

It seems longer and it seems like last month. Two years ago I had a major heart attack. Nothing has been the same since then.

On the advice of my cardiologist, I became a strict plant eater and would you believe that I, a person who never denied myself anything or any amount (food-wise), have been 100% compliant? It’s true. I call my diet Vegan Plus although when you think about it, that should really be Vegan Minus. Not only do I avoid animals and animal products but also extra fat in any form. That means no oil, butter, mayo, nuts, avocado, egg yolks, cheese, animal milk. And yet, I eat better than ever before, have a much wider variety of meals and snacks and I’m never hungry. Plus, my lab work is perfect, I lost a ton of weight, I’m more active and my skin looks pretty danged good.

Anyway, two years ago and I’m still standing. I say this because I’m not dead. That’s not as funny as it sounds because throughout my younger life before I became a nurse, I used to hear about people who had major heart attacks – always embellished with helpful editorial remarks such as “came back from the dead” , “already died once” and “should be dead already” – I thought of those poor people standing right there in front of me as the walking dead. After I became a nurse, my way of thinking never changed. It didn’t help that I was in a nursing specialty that dealt with people who had a terminal disease. Not heart disease, but my mind had been trained to accept the concept of borrowed time. Over time, that feeling subsided, or maybe I just didn’t deal directly with sick people anymore. I never thought of the heart attack victims living on borrowed time at all.

Then, it happened to me. I was almost dead. But I came back from the dead. Even though I should be dead already. When I’m with my friends, I try to read their minds to determine if they think I’m living on bowered time. I’m afraid that if the tables were turned and I was looking at them post-heart attack, I’d be thinking that.

Actually, I feel quite normal. Except that I have to neurotically touch my pacemaker every day, which makes me feel like I have verified that it’s functioning properly. Or try to mystically assess if my coronary arteries are closing up due to unwitting consumption of hidden fat. And take a minute or two to fret that everything could just go black all of a sudden and then just like that, I’ll actually be dead. Again.

Not so much Walking Dead as Walking A Little Bit Crazy.

Well, this took a dark turn. I meant it to be the celebration of life, of the joy of veganism, the power of plant based eating, an old dog learning a wonderful new trick. Instead it turned into a look inside my head. Sorry about that.

That’s what I love about blogging. The truth comes out no matter what you set out to do. I should do this more often.

To end things on a happier note, the crape myrtles are in bloom now.

16 thoughts on “Two Years Ago”

  1. Thank God you’re still here!! And that you found a way to stay alive.

    Though… anytime I read the word ‘vegan’ I have to eat some butter. 🙂

    Also… your crapes are beautiful! Mine are still so small!

  2. Thank you for sharing your raw testimony. In reflection, I’ve always heard people say that dark times make us see the light more clearly. While I hate to experience darkness, it makes life rich and colorful and beautiful in ways I never knew before the darkness.

    Your light has always been a bright one but I’m sure enjoying the recent flash!!

  3. Oh my I am so sorry to hear of this! I knew something had happened and that it must have been pretty big to turn you into a vegan. I’m grateful you are still with us and feeling better than ever! Keep on blogging! You still entertain me 💛

    1. Thank you and ❤️ You forever, Rebecca.
      Thinking of renaming this resurrected blog “ From Kielbasa To Kale” except I go out of my way to avoid kale.😬

      Maybe “We’re All Idiots” or “You Can’t Stop What’s Going To Happen”?
      Nah. Too dark.
      Ok here it is : “Second Bloom”
      Except it’s more like “Seventh Bloom”

      Yeah. That’s it.

  4. I don’t know. I really like the name as it is lol. I discovered you after the 2008 “election” and you know we can’t change history!

  5. Wow! So glad you’re still with us! And, true to form, you have turned your recovery into a fun (and delicious) adventure. Bon appétit!

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