Stand By Your Bad Scungilli

I interrupt my unintentional blogging hiatus to tell you that this is by far the best article describing the courthouse appearance today of RHONJ creatures Joe and Teresa Giudice. To which they arrived In. A. Honda. Pick Up Truck.!

So much to talk about! I can’t decide which is the best part: I was going to say the part where Juicy Joe slapped a news camera out of his way but that pales in comparison with the description of the happy couple as looking like there were digesting bad scungilli. Then I thought maybe the best part is when Joe’s little old mother dropped the f bomb onto a reporter.

But this is all eclipsed by Joe’s devoted father who defiantly shows first the finger and then his ass to the cameras.

g

Does this ass make my ass look big?

That’s love. I don’t think my father would have done that for me. And look at Teresa competing in the ass contest without even trying.

What a family! These are my people! Or rather, these are the people I have to compete with for parking spaces. New Jersey – come for the parking spaces; stay for the rude public gestures! We bad.

I notice there are no Gorgas around for this event. No Bahbah, around whom Teresa lives her life. No Nonah, that teacher of tomato canning and contributor of recipes to those NY Times best selling cook books. No My Brother. No Melissa.

I only hope this does not render The Faux Milania G silent on Twitter.

tfmg

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10 thoughts on “Stand By Your Bad Scungilli

  1. The NJ Italians do the arm bend va-fa-$@* with the finger up? I haven’t seen this variation before. Italy Italians and my Chicago peeps use the closed fist/bent arm/antecubital hand slap ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Nothing if not classy. I always thought your outrageous and rebellious bent was a wonderful gene pool but I now think it is geographic.

    • OT: I am in the Red Zone of befuddlement on the “Jesus loves me like Martin Morgenstern” tweet. Is there a snowball’s chance in hell that you will offer further explanation of it?

      • I’m busy these days and don’t have the time to carefully build out my obscure references to drag everybody along with me. I’ll try to be more careful.

        Here, I was talking about a paint-by-number Last Supper where one of the surprised apostles looks like the actor that played Rhoda’s father. In fairness, though – he didn’t grow his beard until he was Rose Nyland’s boyfriend 15 years later. NO WONDER NOBODY GOT IT.

        So see it wasn’t even worth it.

  3. Never watched the show because I figured I see enough of those people in real life, but I admit to a massive case of schadenfreude going on here.

    They were released on $500K bail each. In most cases 10% of that has to be in cash, the rest guaranteed by “real” assets, e.g. a home. So they somehow came up with $100K in cash, but the home in this case is the subject of the alleged mortgage fraud. I would guess that they do not have $900K of their own skin in that game, hence not sure how well that functions as a guarantee.

    Until this is cleared up I think they are still scamming their way through life.

    The good news: they each have separate attorneys so one throwing the other to the wolves is a distinct possibility. (Did I mention the schadenfreude?)

  4. I suspect that this is a very clever post, but I know nothing about these people so most of it is lost on me. I do, however, understand a woman with a large butt who should not be photographed from behind and should not wear white pants, ever. So there’s that. Which made me smile.

    • Do you have big haired small-brained Jersey girls in the midwest, too?

      Well, you have to be a fan of trash TV to understand this particular real housewife of New Jersey. Her. Not me.

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