Wait I Wasn’t Done Talking About Myself Yet

Birthday pie. I like cake under certain specific circumstances (if it’s covered in coconut, if it’s 3:00 and I skipped breakfast and lunch and there’s a cake in the break room, and so on) but given a choice, I would much rather have pie. Since it was my birthday, I chose to celebrate over a lemon meringue pie instead of a cake.

My firm belief is that the popularity of Key Lime pie is responsible for the overthrow of Lemon Meringue in this country. Key Lime sounds like its going to be good but how many people have you heard say that the piece they just ordered is not that good vs those who say “yum yum this is good”?  That’s because they are saying they want key lime but they really do want lemon meringue.

Birthday present. A brilliant blue deluxe French watering can. My dears, I am the Goddess Of The Gentle Rains with this thing. And the most intriguing thing about it is that it came bearing a sticker announcing that it was made in Oyonnax. I looked it up and found out that it’s the second largest commune in France located in the Valleé Plastique. How thrilling and odd to think of French hippies totally devoted to plastic household goods instead of the more common fascination with organic vegetables and smoking dope.  Creating understanding and brotherhood by sending lightweight durable goods around the globe for the betterment of man. Peace love and plastic. What weird and wonderful souls the French hippies must be.

Then I researched further only to learn that a commune is a designation for a small geographical area  similar to a township or a parish. Major let down. But it was thrilling for a while and now I am left with this fabulous watering can, if a thing made of plastic can be called a can.

Banging The O. The O key on my work laptop has become uncooperative. Do you know how many words have Os in them? A lot that’s how many. I am spending a lot of time going back through emails and forms that I type filling in the Os by banging hard on the key. It’s taking a physical toll on me.

Truth be told I had some keyboard trouble a few weeks ago and when I called the IT department to fix it, they sent me a replacement keypad and link to a YouTube video that shows you how to open the laptop case and swap out the keypad. Seriously?

I do believe that I have outlived my expectations. While I’ve been groomed to expect that not only will I bring home the bacon but that in addition, I would fry it up in the pan but I have not been prepared to swap out my own laptop keypad. It’s a new world, although not necessarily a brave one.


UPDATE: I have single-handedly changed the keypad on my laptop. And I used a nail file to do it. The world will never be the same. RAWR.

6 thoughts on “Wait I Wasn’t Done Talking About Myself Yet”

  1. I thought RAWR was a word I had to look up. The Urban Dictionary says,
    “1. A word that means ‘I Love You’ in dinosaur.”

  2. I love lemon meringue pie. My mother made the best one. I, too, think that those cute little key limes have charmed the world into thinking that goop made from them belongs under meringue– and that lemons are just for -ade now. ‘Tis a tragedy, I tell you.

  3. Lemon Meringue Pie is the official dessert of the sea food dinner. So speaks the Voice of God— indistinguishable from that of Cripes Suzette, except that she is funnier and more Jersey-centric.

  4. Key lime pie-whipped cream
    Lemon pie-whipped egg whites
    No contest-whipped cream trumps whipped egg whites.

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