Heat

UPDATE: The mystery infomercial product has been identified by commenter Linda the Appraiser. It’s the TopStyler.  And wow! was Schmed ever right about the S&H : $19.95! Not only that, check out the total price:

“LIMITED TIME OFFER! $14.99 Trial Offer is for two (2) TopStylers® for 30 days (plus $19.99 shipping and processing). After 30 days, do nothing and keep BOTH TopStylers® for just three monthly payments of $39.99. The second TopStyler® is FREE!!”

So that would be a total of $154.95? Holy cow. No wonder they don’t play these things in the daytime when the customers are wide awake and able to add up the total cost.

……………………………………

1. Hello fellow insomniacs! There’s a new infomercial taking over the wee small hours airwaves – the C-Shell hair curler.  It’s basically a ceramic clam shell clip. You make your own finger curl, clamp it with a  heated c-shell and boom! -sharp springy curls in 4 minutes.

The infomercial follows the standard script and has the elements you’d except to see: thin, pretty girls that clap when the curls are revealed, the slide with the price, followed immediately by the news that you get two sets for that price. And what a price it is: $14.95 for a set of 10 in a zippered case heater. X2. Which sounds like a bargain to me. Here’s the thing: there’s no internet reference to this product at all. I find that suspicious.

2. A woman in a Florida restaurant suffered first and second degree burns when a table-side prep of Bananas Foster went up in a ball of fire. A total of 4 people were injured BUT DON’T WORRY BECAUSE DAMAGE TO THE RESTAURANT WAS MINIMAL.

“The waiter was making a dessert dish that involved alcohol that goes in flames, I believe it’s a bananas foster,” said Bob Markford of Palm Harbor Fire Rescue. “At one point, he was adding some more liquid to it, or more alcohol to it and it burned back to the bottle. When he lifted the bottle to pull away from it, some of it came out and hit some of the patrons”

Obviously, a security breach –  the rum bottle must have been hacked.

3. My camera still lives in Philadelphia and my cellphone camera doesn’t do justice to the utterly fascinating pattern of little hairs stamped into the vinyl of my faux giraffe handbag but I assure you that it’s totally hott.


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13 thoughts on “Heat

  1. I don’t know about the clam shell hair thingy, but I’m here to tell you that the Ahh Bra is wondermous. I could easily sleep in one. If I could sleep. Which I can’t, which is why I know about it in the first place.

  2. Yeah, Sharp springy curls in 4 minutes that become limp stringy coils as soon as you leave the house. Can you say Medusa? Been there. Done that.

    I’ve never heard of inhaled burns, but the image is horrific. Lawsuits ahead.

  3. I CALLED LAST NIGHT JUST TO SEE ABOUT THIS AND WHEN THEY MENTIONED THE 39.99 FOR 3 MONTHES PLUS AN ADDITIONAL 19.95 FOR SHIPPING THATS RIGHT THEY CHARGE THE SHIPPING TWICE . I SAID NO THANKS … WELL THEY CALLED BACK THIS MORNING WITH A BETTER OFFER 99.99 PLUS THE 19.95 FOR SHIPPING AGAIN I SAID NO THANK YOU JUST WONDERING IF THEY WILL CALL BACK TOMORROW WITH A BETTER OFFER.. JUST SAYIN!!!!!

  4. It’s very suspicious that you can’t find ANY other information on the web about this product!!!!! NO REVIEWS, etc. and it took a half hour of looking to find your site. No way am I going to pay $159 to try a product that no doubt will not refund your money since there is no listed company that sells it.

  5. You know, they now have more click able links on that front page, including a section called Return Policy. The main message there is:

    “This Agreement provides that all disputes between you and CALDO CALDO, LLC will be resolved by MANDATORY, BINDING ARBITRATION.You thus GIVE UP YOUR RIGHT TO GO TO COURT to assert or defend your rights under this Agreement”

    Nice, eh? Even nicer is the part where you agree to these terms by the act of opening the package. Seriously!

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