I Have Never Made A Pickle Fan

… and I guess I never will.

* sob sob sob *

Look at this. The smooth creaminess of the cream cheese that contrasts with the sharp crunch of the pickle. The sweetness of the gherkin vs. the tang of the horseradish. A base that is soft yielding bread on one side and golden toast on the other. If ever there was a canape meant for a Gemini, this is it.

Just when I had decided on Petals ‘N Pickles as our Mad Men watching party appetizer, word came to me that one of the twenty-somethings has developed an intolerance to cheese. I tried mightily to argue that cream cheese is a fat and not a cheese – which is 100% true – but it was decided that we could not in good conscience serve this.

This is a terrible blow to me because all of my adult life, I have considered myself to be the type of person who could crank out Petal N’ Pickles at a moments’ notice, I have never done so. I don’t know why – I always mean to do it but it just never happened. I’m on a mission now to create an alternate past for myself and I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to catch up to all the Petals N’ Pickles I never made.

I forgot to mention that both twenty-somethings are vegetarians so there goes your cocktail franks and your Cheesy Baloney Foldovers. Clearly, I need a new posse.

8 thoughts on “I Have Never Made A Pickle Fan”

  1. Instead of the cream cheese you could use the deviled ham or chicken spread that comes in the little bitty cans. I remember things speared on toothpicks, too….pickle chunks and salami kinds of stuff.

  2. For a minute there I thought those rose-pink thingies were raspberries and I was going to be ill. Colored cream cheese piped on to look like flowers. Darn, how clever.

    Did you know that the “I Hate to Cook Cookbook” is being republished? It was written to release millions of tired housewives from having to color cream cheese and pipe it on to things.

      1. This is one of the many reasons I love reading your blog, Suzette. You are always ahead of the curve on developing trends.

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