Everywhere A Sign

The sunny Saturday was the perfect day for a little jaunt down to south Jersey.

Sign on the back of a big white Suburban:

No prob, Pops. In fact, i would never bring up the subject of The DaVinci Code at all unless I was trying to describe an outdated system of ranking IQ levels and needed an example for “moron”.

Sign on a restaurant table:

As a general rule, I eschew anything “tini” except of course a genuine classic Martini. There was a point in time before my tuna melt arrived when  I thought an Almond Joy Martini might be a good idea. [Note to self: try eating your first meal before 3:30pm next time.] Exhale now – I didn’t have one. There’s nothing about this that is even remotely martini-like:

Almond Joy Martini

Malibu Rum, Creme de Cacao & Whipped Cream

Sign at Sonic:

Oh, Sonic! I didn’t know about you. I mean, I saw the ads on TV but I didn’t get that this was a drive-UP not a drive-THROUGH. I couldn’t wrap my head around either the menu offerings  or the rollerskating carhops who wore change dispensers on their  belts. Such a wealth of slushes and cremes and ades and whips. AND CORNDOGS. It was my first trip, so I got the classic and beloved Cherry Limeade and it was good but I’m so so  sorry that I didn’t get the coconut creme pie shake.

21 thoughts on “Everywhere A Sign”

  1. Godfrey Daniel! Why not just pour 100 proof vodka into a bottle of Ne-Hi Grape and be done with it?

    And some one needs to tell Mr. Suburban Owner that if her were a Templar he wouldn’t need that bumper sticker.

    1. The experience was mind boggling. I could not process that menu and even when my daughter was reading to me, I had keep asking “Where does it say that?” I’ll be more prepared next time. Luckily/unluckily, there’s none around where I live.

  2. That “grape tootsie roll martini” sounds like it might well be the most vile concoction I’ve ever heard of… Seriously, WTF? Who even thought to put those two liquids in the same glass?

    (Full disclosure: I’ve had an Almond Joy drink before, but it’s okay because it was a shot, not some pitiful girl drink trying to gain respectability pretending to be martini based on glassware… it was delicious.)

    Sonics are big where I come from, and let me tell you, Suzette, you missed a trick by not ordering the coconut creme shake… I was so happy when they finally opened one up here.

  3. Coffee: black, steaming hot.
    Milkshake: vanilla/chocolate ice cream & milk.
    Mixed drinks: no more than 2 different liquors, no ice.
    Chick drinks: one liquor, one juice, no ice.
    Purists unite!!! Protest!! Stop the insanity!!

    1. In principle, I agree with you. But I have to say, the whole Sonic experience dazzled me. I only got a limeade to drink, but I have been replaying the whole confusing thing over and over.

  4. My favorite Starbucks customers are the ones in front of me who order the Venti Black Eye with extra shots. I admire someone that in need of stimulation who is not hooked up to a defibrillator.

    No girlie drink, that!

  5. We don’t have a Sonic or an In and Out…unless you want to drive 20 miles over to Salinas and dodge the gangs. It would make for an exciting outing though. I have to go the local RG Burger when I need a burger/fries hit. Boringly traditional…have to have a Coke (and none of that diet stuff either) with mine.

  6. The good thing is you don’t have to press the button to get the order-taker on the intercom UNTIL YOU ARE GOOD AND READY AND HAVE ABSORBED ALL THE CONTENT AND ORGANIZED YOUR THOUGHTS.

    It’s like they KNOW you are going to have a hell of a time and they have thoughtfully allowed you to proceed at your own pace.

    Say you have an iPhone with you. You could easily go online and email a friend, sort of like “Phone a Friend” in Who Wants To Be A Sonic Customer”:

    “Hi, Fiona? Yeah I’m still at Sonic, haven’t pressed the button. I’m going to email you a screen cap of the bottom-left section of the menu on the LEFT side of our car, which is the food menu, we think. The passenger-side menu is the desserts/drinks, apparently. Anyway check the screen cap pic and point out the burgers for me if you have a few minutes, thanks.”

    And you wait for the email. There’s no need to go it alone.

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