All That Photoshopping And They Still Couldn’t Fix The Little Eye

The cover girl juggernaut of World Famous Fashion Icon and Busy Mom Michelle Obama continues. It’s all over the place so I didn’t think that I should have to comment on it, but so far I haven’t seen anyone mention the Little Eye.

best Jezebel comment: "It's like they tried to photoshop her underbite out by adding on tooth over her lips."

She is one big bag of ugly – even this extreme photoshop couldn’t hide that. While I am highly amused by all the the photos of her enormous bare feet that can barely be contained by her shoes, I long for the day that America has a First Lady who has at least a glancing acquaintance with hosiery.

I was putting together a little photographic study of complied images where her feet are trying to escape from the fronts, backs and sides of her shoes when I came across this specimen at Michelle Obama’s Mirror Blog and I just had to stop and ponder for a while. I have a few questions.

Question #1: When did we change the background of the seal of the White House to purple?

it sure looks purple to me

Question #2: unspecified inquiry into the general WTF-ness of MOO’s appearance.


For the moment, let’s forget that her arches and toe cracks are exposed and her slip is hanging. Can you tell me what is going on with those inflated veins? I don’t believe this is something we’ve seen before, is it? Since it’s only on one side, I’m thinking that the leg of her panty girdle rolled up and is acting like a tourniquet.

Question #4: Do they still make Supp-hose? Michelle dear, we’re getting near that age. I smell the potential to spark a new craze in ladies’ wear if she adopts these. Lord knows she could use them.  Soon fashions seekers everywhere could get that instantly recognizable MOO look by wearing any combination of giant pins, boob belts and/or support stockings.

18 thoughts on “All That Photoshopping And They Still Couldn’t Fix The Little Eye”

  1. I have wondered for the longest time about the fit of her shoes but didn’t have any expertise in that area. The pumps always looked too small and the sandals seemed to jam her toes together.
    Since I’ve been into the “sensible” shoe stage of life for a while now, I’m not familiar with the current fashionable styles and her shoes always looked like the ones I wore in the ’80’s. Back in the day, the only time hose-less legs were acceptable was with casual shorts and sandals.

    1. She refuses to buy sweaters in her size, why should she have a different policy regarding shoes? I think she’s in denial… one of those women who say “I still wear the same size as I did in high school!”

      Yes, dear… you can still wear the same sizes… the only problem is that they just don’t. fit. anymore.

  2. The skinny little heels of those shoes must be some sort of titanium (the highest strength-to-weight ratio of any metal) alloy.

  3. I’m still trying to get over the “artiste” photoshopping MO’s head on Nancy Reagans body. I missed the eye entirely.
    The WH Seal must have something to do with the SEIU and Stern’s occupation. Presently on the Economic Advisory Board, most frequent visitor to the WH, probably occupying the Lincoln Bedroom by now. (note; purple ties and suits on the top three officials in DC)

  4. She could also use one of those harness thingies that force one’s shoulders back… she has the worst posture of any adult woman I’ve ever seen.

  5. In our house, we call the “toe cracks” toe cleavage. When trying on shoes, someone says “No, does not look good. You have toe cleavage”. I know she has one teenage girl in the house. I can not for the life of me believe that girl is happy with the way her mother looks. As for the Good Housekeeping. I laughed by their headline of “Collector’s Edition”. Mine will be collecting food scraps on the bottom of my garbage can or be sent back to Good Housekeeping.

  6. Am I the only one who thinks her head was photoshopped onto another body on the magazine cover? I mean seriously… not a single thing in that photo looks real. Of course they might have done a few things to straighten her shoulders and very likely increased the size of that little triangle of light between her body and her arm to make her look more svelte.

    Not to mention the dress in the first photo looks a bit too nice for MOO to be wearing. It doesn’t make her look like a bag lady. Compare and contrast her posture and the style of clothing between the mag cover and the speech… no contest. The first image is faked. Heh.

    The little eye is proof that somewhere along the line they did start with a picture of her face.

  7. As Retail Associates attest…there are still support hose available. I would think that nurses as well would like them…or do they all wear pant uniforms now? Hue has some and Hanes still does them…and they’re not like the old “surgical hose” that women with varicose veins used to have to make do with.

  8. And this is the Collector’s Issue! Means this godawful image will be around to haunt her until the end of her life. (She actually looks embalmed here, but never mind….)

    And I agree that the body in the blue dress does NOT look like hers.

    As for the tight shoes and the popping leg veins, they explain the pained look on her face. It’s all coming together…..

    (Suze: Panty hose? Not a chance. Industrial Strength Full Length Spanx.)

  9. Her mouth looks like it was photoshopped from Pamela Anderson and her legs from Bill Cosby. There is NOTHING about this overly large bag of gas that is attractive.

  10. I just found your blog. I love it!!

    I also just noticed that Meanchelle puts her brows on with a sharpie. I can’t believe I never noticed before. I don’t think she actually has any brows.

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