Snippets From the Annual Let’s Get A New Nativity Set Conversation

He: "What the hell is that?"
She: "It's a little plastic piglet."
"He: "There were no pigs there. That's why you never see a pig in a nativity scene."
She: "Listen, I know they were Jewish but that doesn't mean there weren't any pigs at all in Bethlehem, does it?"


He: "Does it have one of those men with the lamb around his neck?"
She: "A shepherd?"
He: "Yeah."
She: "No. this set is German. It's the Italians that did that lamb-neck wear thing so they incorporated it into their Nativity sets."
"He: "The Italians know what they're doing. The Germans can go screw themselves. And they can screw those big fat sausages, too."


He: "What about an angel?"
She: "There's no angel. I'm thinking of putting a swan on the roof. It's either that or a fairy."
He: "  …  "
She: "Don't say there's no swans there. I read that oil-rich princes hunt them with silver-plated machine guns."
He: "That's the Saudis. Screw them."


She: "Did they have chickens?"

He: "I don't know."
She:"What about a cat? Did they have a cat?"
He: "No."
She: "Yes, they did so have a cat."


She: "Anyway, I don't need that kind of shepherd. I have this one."

He: "That's a dog."
She: ""I know! It's a German Shepherd. Get it?"

He: "The Germans can go screw themselves."

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