Best FDIL Ever

Reasons that my FDIL is the best ever:

  • She completely gets me when it comes to handbag purchases and is uber supportive and encouraging even if I don’t really need another one.
  • She agreed to watch all 10 hours of “The Thornbirds” with me even though Barbara Stanwyck and Richard Chamberlain mean nothing to her.
  • She likes to have a companionable glass of wine and some girl talk to pass the time while the hunter/gatherers are gone off to Pep Boys to hunt for car parts.
  • We can do girly things together like using paper nut cups during cocktail hour, so very unlike the hunter/gatherers around here who stick their giant paws right into my Stangl “Rooster” lug-handled soup bowl to gather as many nuts as they can get in one handful.

Truth

Like most living human beings, I bridle at the thought of a death panel deciding who lives and who dies. I’ve probably had more time to think about this that my readers have because I have had a long career in the dialysis business. Did you know that there once were panels that decided who was worthy of receiving life-saving kidney replacement treatments?

It wasn’t that long ago. In fact, it was happening right up until 1972. Dialysis machines were limited, each treatment was long and expensive and there simply wasn’t enough to go around for all who needed. Some of the criteria for being accepted were quite surprising.

  • Age. No older people were accepted, meaning anyone over age 55.
  • Marital status. Single? No dialysis for you.
  • Value to society. Never mind no dialysis in jail programs which proliferate now, if you had a criminal record for anything you weren’t going to be granted access to continued life.
  • No other medical conditions except kidney failure. No diabetics, no people with bone disease, no blind or deaf people. No nothing.
  • Employment. You had to have a job. No wasting any high-demand treatment on those who were too sick to work and contribute to society.
Think about it. Would you qualify for dialysis in 1971? Here’s an article from a 1987 medical/legal journal – ironically making an argument for rationing heart transplants – that has an interview with one of the panelists:

Chilling, is it not? The 1987 article still holds this record because the facts haven’t been white washed or disappeared from memory. You’d have a hard job finding any reference at all to it in contemporary journals. So that is a true and recent example of someone else deciding life maintaining treatment.

When it comes to self-determination of end of life situations, this is the truth:

“It’s not something that we like to talk about, but doctors die, too. What’s unusual about them is not how much treatment they get compared with most Americans, but how little. They know exactly what is going to happen, they know the choices, and they generally have access to any sort of medical care that they could want. But they tend to go serenely and gently. Doctors don’t want to die any more than anyone else does. But they usually have talked about the limits of modern medicine with their families. They want to make sure that, when the time comes, no heroic measures are taken.” Why Doctors Die Differently 

link via Maggie’s Farm

I’m sorry they used the word “treatment” in that second sentence – it would be more accurate to say “end of life treatment” because that’s what we’re talking about here. There’s a big difference between making your own decisions about end of life plans and being denied treatment for non-terminal situations based on your age, your social habits or if you’re a U.S. congressperson.

Anyway, if you know any people who’ve been in healthcare for any length of time, you recognize the truth in this article. Go out and find a nurse anywhere in this country and ask them if they’ve ever joked about getting a tattoo that reads DO NOT RESUSCITATE across their chest. I bet they have. I’ve said it and I’m not joking.

Having A Fit

News bulletin: I’m going to a bra fitter. It might not be today, although today is a good day for it. One does not just walk out the door and head for the bra fitter. It’s the kind of thing one has to build up to doing.

I tried to find the proper terminology for bra fitter but the closest I could come was a corsetiere, but that is not quite right. I guess we’ll stick with the plain spoken term bra fitter.

Interesting, but not original:  In the French language, the term for brassière is soutien-gorge (literally “throat-support”). Ha. Ha. Amirite, ladies?  For ladies of a certain age, hiking things up to where they started out would pretty much result in throat-level imagery.

Ah, well. The image on the right is no exaggeration and I suppose this is how things are going to end up for me. I imagine I’ll have to down scale my orchid corsage to fit once my throat gets involved with my foundation garments.

Bird Bath Update

I went to my favorite junk store this week and lo and behold! – $30 bird baths!

Stupid Blackberry camera. It's really a nice mottled royal blue like the picture on the box.

So, I don’t know. The color is nice but I don’t really care for the shape. In my experience, if you buy something based on its cheap price, you are stuck with it almost as long as you would be with a more expensive item that you really love.

But a person would have to be a fool to pass up a ridiculous bargain like a $30 bird bath.

Those Krazy Kennedys!

“MOUNT KISCO — Robert F. Kennedy’s son, Douglas, is facing charges related to an incident in which he clashed with two nurses who tried to stop him taking his newborn son for a walk outside a hospital maternity ward. Kennedy, 44, was charged with misdemeanor harassment and endangering the welfare of a child over the Jan. 7 argument, during which he allegedly grabbed one nurse by the wrist and kicked another in the pelvis” … NY Post

Do the Kennedy men ever run out of fascinating descriptions? I guess we can add Pelvis Kicker to Intern Deflowerer, Secretary Drowner and Dumbell Pilot.

I have some questions about this:

  • Who takes an infant out of a hospital bassinet so he can go outside for fresh air? FYI – infants’ immune systems are not fully functional at age 3 days and fresh air positively drips with pathogens. Have a little influenza with your “vigah”, why doncha?
  • Who doesn’t know that hospitals have been employing strict measures to limit risk of kidnapping of newborns? This isn’t anything new – it’s been standard practice for decades. And it applies to fathers as well as unrelated baby stealers.
  • Although this particular heir to Camelot was arrested for his little stunt, the real crime here in my opinion is that he named this kid Boru. Irish royalty notwithstanding, the boy is in for a lifetime of Sacha Baron Cohen jokes.
  • Not a question but a point of interest:  “violent shaking of the baby’s head and neck.” My my, Douglas. Also, video from the hospital  surveillance cameras at this link.
Both sides have already lawyered up. I’m not sure that the poor nurses stand a chance. Check out this report and then wait for the Kennedy mouthpiece at the end:

“While holding the child in his right arm, Kennedy kicked Luciano in the pelvis with his right foot, knocking her backward onto the floor, police said. As he did this, Kennedy fell onto the floor with the baby in his arms. Kennedy then got up and ran “down the stairs with the infant until he was stopped by security and escorted back to the infant’s room,” the police report said. The police report did not say whether the infant was harmed but Kennedy’s lawyer told NBC New York the baby was not injured and slept during the altercation.” … MSNBC.com

At the moment, there’s been no comment from the toothy beam of vigor that is the child’s grandmother.

douglas kennedy

This is not the first time that Douglas Kennedy has appeared on the pages of Cripes Suzette. From the archives : Go-Go Mama Ethel keeps her eye on hyperactive Douglas in a world yet to discover the “hyperactive” label for bad boys.

Handbag Update

The fascinating fabric of my new Mother Of The Groom clutch purse is taking over the world.

Just this week

  • I saw a wristlet at Handbag heaven
  • the FDIL sent me a picture of a tote bag she saw in a local store
  • and my daily email form Sam Moon featured it on a big orange tote
  • and , honeys – even shoes at Zappos.

I think the word you’re searching for here is “EGAD!”