One Sunny Day in New Hampshire

Oh, she’s back – she’s back! We missed ya, Hillz. And OMG they’ve got matching outfits! They’re ready for a couples competition in ballroom dance or a Sonny & Cher road show. Everybody sing:

[HIM:] They say I’m young – my ears are big.
At least I’m not a blue pant-suited pig.
[HER:] I think I know how you stay thin.
Did you get here by riding on a Schwinn?



The answer to what Hillary’s been doing all this time seems to be fairly apparent – she’s been packing on the hip meat and she grew a little pooch, too while she was at it. Maybe that’s the underlying cause of her “campaign” debt – the bills for all that arugula started rolling in.




The presumptive nominee checks out the rear view to see if it’s any better and presumes that it was more like a gallon of ice cream, a bottle of Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup and a spoon. Every night.




In a belated bit of political fence-mending, BO attempts a conciliatory gesture aimed at Muslim American voters. By placing his coat over Hillary’s head, he can prove to Muslim voters that he’s got nothing against covered-up women.In this case, he prefers it that way.




Bill is not the only Clinton who wants their ass kissed by Obama. Hillary waits while Barack indicates he’s rather  choke himself with his tie. There’s not enough angry old lady voters in the country to make that happen.

Scenes From A Campaign:

  • Unity, N.H., is not just small, it’s small and out-of-the-way. For the attendees, the choice of location would be a nightmare.
  • the Obama campaign went to great lengths to separate the media from the crowd, deliberately making it difficult for reporters to interview attendees
  • It was a hot day, nearly 90 degrees, and there was no shelter.
  • thousands of attendees stood in the downpour awaiting thier bus
  • It had become apparent by the end of the day that the campaign really hadn’t given any thought to the comfort of the people it had bused in.

“The poor folks who gave up an entire day of their lives to see this event got sunburned, dehydrated, then soaked all so Obama could have his symbolic unification rally in this remote town.It was also ironic that the campaign that has made so much out of promising the swift and orderly withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq could not even manage an exit strategy for Unity, N.H.”   Andrew Cline, The American Spectator

Maybe the Foxes, Mink, Great-horned Owls, Herons and Hawks Will Be Able to Resist the Squeaky Rubber Hamburgers and Get Down to Business

I could have told you that muskrats are the enemy of mankind. Just ask my former flowerbed . What used to be a glorious 24 foot stretch of Black-eyed Susans is now just a memory. In it’s place is dirt, weeds and a giant sedum that must not taste good.

The muskrats come up from the creek and eat whatever they please in my backyard. What pleases them most this year is Black-eyed Susans. They ate every single one of them down to the roots and when the flowers tried to sprout up again, the muskrats came back and chewed them down to the ground. I left the bed hoping that the muskrats would move on and the flowers would come back. Didn’t happen.

Well now I see that the muskrats are responsible for the collapse of the levees along the Mississippi. I didn’t need to read the whole story to know what happened.

Is that a rubber hamburger Our old dog used to do a pretty good job of keeping the backyard free from the tresspass of muskrats as well as cats, squirrels, rabbitts, birds, chipmunks and blowing  leaves. Now the new dog is busy with his rubber hamburger and the small wildlife has taken over. He already had a dozen meals since he got here and I’m not feeding him without expecting something in return. The internets say that muskrats natural enemies are foxes, mink, great horned-owls, herons and hawks. I haven’t seen any of those around here but I’m not sure that even they could resist the siren call of a good squeak toy.

NOW You Tell Me

This is the kind of demotivator I don’t need to see during the early stages of my Somersizing:

Cheek Fat Makes You More Appealing.

“Cheeks are vital to what we consider beautiful – from chubby-cheeked infants to Hollywood stars like Angelina Jolie”  ( and blogging personalities like Suzette).

” said study co-author Joel Pessa of University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center. “This research breaks new ground

A Blog Post That Does Not Contain The Words Dog, Puppy or Corgi

I forgot that the best thing about Somersizing is the fruit smoothies in the mornings.

This was the food plan that was most successful for me in the past and I thought I'd give it another whirl. The thought occurred to me right after my Thursday Night Martini Club partner told me she was going Full Atkins to get ready for her annual vacation with her extended family and wanted The Club to go on hiatus until she returned. So …  join 'em, ya know?

The Somersize plan is easy to live with.Basically, it's a low-carb plan but allows fruits and most starches in restricted situations but not restricted amounts. Similar to my relationship with any firm set of rules (shout-out  to the Vatican!), I make my own exceptions: I do have a single cup of coffee with milk in the morning – otherwise I cannot live - and I do not exclude the possibility of some gin getting in once in a while.

Today I whirred up the morning brew from some watermelon, a nectarine and about 25 ice cubes. In about an hour, I'm going to have some steel cut oats. I am very interesting. Don't you agree?

Someone has been licking my foot the entire time that I've been composing this post but I'm not going to say who it is.

How Nice to Have A Corgi That Poses, More or Less, Under the Hosta Again


Hosta 2    Hosta 1

For those long-time readers who look forward to regularly recurring features here at Cripes, Suzette!, I’m pleased to be able to accommodate you with the 2008 version of “Corgi Under The Hosta.” I’m proud to share this photo with you all because it’s the first shot where he doesn’t look like a mildly deranged freak with a giant head. Which he isn’t!

Hosta fans are excused for the remainder of our session; corgi enthusiasts, puppy people and lovers of big ears are invited to view the extended entry.


Corgi Under the Hosta 2005 version

Corgi Under the Hosta 2006 version


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Great Excitement Mixed with High Anxiety


Today is the day that Puppy #6 comes home. Look at him. Not sure what impact this is going to have on blog posting – could go either way. Maybe we’ll have a flood of  “how cute is this puppy?” posts; maybe I’ll be too busy cleaning the kitchen floor to post at all. I already did more preparatory cleaning this weekend than I did all year. On the other hand, I made three corgi-related posts in the last 5 days, so it could go either way.

One indicator of fame and success, according to Merv Griffin, is a head that is disproportionately large for the body. If that’s really true, this is going to be some dog. I have a feeling he’s going to be magnificent.

See you on the other side.